Clash of the Titans

In 1981


29 years later..

Inglorious Basterds

.. is a good movie. I recommend.

Pst.. 2012 sucks.

Jaggery and other Urban Legends

The word of mouth , I have come to realize, is far too potent a tool. Consider history: most of it, as we know it today, has passed on through several mouths across generations. One can only begin to imagine the distortions it has gone through before finding the pen, ending up as folklore at best rather than hard facts.

Case in point being a recent discussion in my class where we were analyzing the ethical framework over which the book 'My Experiments with Truth' was based on. To stress on Gandhi's moral highness, our professor mentioned an anecdote about how Gandhi refused to give fundas to a kid on addiction to jaggery before he himself gave it up. Before I could add that coincidently, I knew the very same story except with Prophet Muhammed in place of Mahatma Gandhi, a fellow classmate countered saying that the story belonged to Guru Nanak and not Gandhi.

While it is still plausible that religions share a common set of values that are considered desirable in every person, and that such stories were possibly created to imbibe these values, it is scary to watch such stories creep into politics. In my opinion, Gandhi was one of the greatest leaders who with sharp acumen and the right strategies had led an entire nation to freedom from slavery. That act would suffice for me to title him the Father of the Nation. But the minute his character is given idealistic moral attributes, in an attempt to make him more than was, it leads to the creation of new deities and newer religions. Whether such a thing has already led to the existing religions is a matter of personal opinion. The life-is-a-bitch part of it is that current wars and beliefs are based on this very same history.

I do not think it would be an exaggeration to extrapolate the trend. Fifty years from now, it's possible that we hear the story of how Sachin refused to give Dhoni fundas in life till he himself stopped eating Jaggery.

Mid Air Trap

Most of us have probably faced this often but never noticed it. You never see it coming. But once you're in it, there is no escape. For a while at least.

All the airlines in India mostly have either the Boeing 737 or the Airbus A320 models for domestic travel which have a single narrow corridor along the length of the aircraft. Sometime around 10 minutes after the flight has settled at a comfortable altitude, the announcement of refreshments being served/sold is made. Now I'm not sure if it's the AC, the word 'refreshments' or simply my bladder muscles reacting to the dizzying heights, I almost always have this urge to relieve myself at that very instant. I look out into the corridor and see that although the doors show green, both ends of the passage are blocked with pretty girls guiding metallic trolleys moving at a painfully slow pace who refuse to move backwards to accommodate my needs.

Several times have I walked into this trap and spent uncomfortable moments looking awkwardly outside the window hoping to be distracted.

Is there hope at the end of the corridor for those who suffer this fate? Yes. Following are a simple set of guidelines which can help you resolve the predicament:

• As soon as the sign for seat belts goes off, rush to fulfill your destiny
• Book a seat towards the ends of the aircraft
• When you gotta go, you Gotta-Go
  
• Don't drink, don't pee.

Hope that helped. Good luck.

Love Aaj Kal

.. beginning .. to choke .. on Punjabi.. Disco tracks.
Must.. breath... aaaaaaaaaaaaghh!!

The List

I have a list of people who I feel should be castrated. Really. It grows by the day. Some folks in it are from my college. There are also hopes of retribution from childhood demons such as the guy who always grabbed the pack of Chicklets my mother used to give me everyday before school.

Now, there is this lady going around installing statues of herself all over the place. With my tax payments. Some might argue that it is illogical to add her to this list due to certain physiological facts that counter such an action. But then, why not? Shouldn't be hard to cut down on her erections.